Pasal blog yang kuno punya lama tak update ni. Hmm, kenapa eh sebenarnya? Rindu jugak zaman zaman sekolah dulu punya eager nak cerita pasal apa jadi semua, macam semi-diary dah blog ni jadinya. Kalau baca balik post dedolu nak tergelak ada termalu ada semua pun ada lah. Korang yang baca entri ni dan cuba nak tengok entri lama lama dulu, tolong jangan tegur aku dah lepas ni. Aku segan! Hahahahahahaha. *gelak awkward sekuat hati*
Ehem. Ehem. Clean throat....
Well, I'm kinda lost motivation in blogging actually. The first time I learned about blogging is from arwah ayah and then I started to like it. I updated this blog almost everyday. I started to learn decorating this blog by myself and I even decorated arwah ayah's blogs. It's a great feeling to has a nice blog and help others to have it also. It's fun to share everything about my life back then. And actually when I'm thinking back about it, I feel that I wrote this blog just to let arwah ayah knows about my life since I know I can't always tell him everything directly and I also know that he is my one and only true follower that always didn't miss to read my entries and leaves a comment sometimes.
I remember one entry, when I was in Form 2. It's about my first experience to go karaoke with my friends. I'm afraid that I can't tell ayah directly but I really want to let him know so that I don't feel bad because not telling him the truth. So, I wrote an entry about it and as I expected, ayah left one comment there. It's funny to read it back. But at least I know that ayah knows what his daughter done even when she is afraid to tell him directly. I felt good since ayah knows the truth from myself, not from everyone else. And right now, I know that this blog has fewer reader than before. I don't care about other readers, the only reader that I care about is ayah. One thing that keep me unmotivated right now is the fact that I know the only person that I want the most to read my blog is not here anymore.
I miss to read his comments in my entries. I miss the fact that I know someone is always read my blog, someone is always watching over me, someone is cares about me. I miss ayah. I miss ayah so badly. Al-Fatihah... :(
I told you, this is such a tetiba story. Tetiba fefeeling sedih, tetiba rindu sangat, tetiba ternangis. Okbai, Nak sambung lap air mata. Good night. Happy Chinese New Year. Happy holiday. Entry bahasa cecampur saja nak try skill writing sebab nanti nak MUET. Kekekeke. Poyo lah, pi lap hingus tu.